Tuesday, March 17, 2009

When to say "I Love You"

I've heard of people marrying within a month of meeting and even know of a guy who proposed after 3 years of dating, before he ever said "I love you" to his fiancee. Therefore, I tune out all the conflicting advice about when to say "I love you." These adages sound like a game of craps: wait 2 months! No, wait 6! Caution shouldn't be about calendar days, but about maintaining the value of the precious verb "to love."

When it might not be too soon to say "I Love You"
When you know that you would still love this person even if sex was suddenly out of the picture, and
When others who are supposed to be attractive bore you, you might be in love instead of lust.
When you've learned your partner's biggest faults and do not attempt to change them, you're ready to love the real human being and not an idealized caricature on a pedestal.
When you've disagreed and realized you would rather be fighting with this person than not-fighting with someone else.
When you've both been saying "I love you" to each other in wordless gestures anyway, and
I think the most important of all: wait until you're ready to say the three words without expecting to hear it back, because love is not selfish or vain - or a guilt trap.

Incidentally, I'm formulating a theory that once you start farting shamelessly around each other, it's time to discuss a lifelong commitment. Thoughts?


  1. farts aren't that deep, I'm afraid.

  2. Would YOU fart openly around someone you didn't think you'd keep around for a very, very long time?

  3. I had a class once and the teacher asked what is the most intimate thing that you would do with somebody you love. Most persons answered things like "sleeping with each other", or saying "I love you".
    Then one person said "taking a dump while the other person is standing next to you". I think that was pretty convincing.

    Why am I telling that? I guess I was just inspired by the mix between the words "love" and this lovely picture.

  4. Have to agree with bgs, someone having a dump while you brush your teeth, Love doesn't go much deeper.

  5. hun, that picture is so disturbing and so amusing!

    your post brought back many memories and makes me honestly question if I will ever stop loving a certain someone.

    Haha, I'm not sure I'm buying your fart-long-term-commitment theory but it's got potential!

  6. I have got a blog post for YOU coming soon about my quest for blue suede pumps. It really was like searching for love. :)

    Thanks for stopping by and commenting!

  7. I wonder how many "I love you" lasted for ever, versus how many "I hate you".

  8. This is hilarious! jajaja I just saw a chapter from Sex & the city (I know, I know but hey I never knew they existed!) where Carrie farts in Big`s presence and the whole debacle this started... It was just as funny as this, although I must say a "dump" with you alongside trumps that BIG TIME!



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