...doubts and freak-outs are crashing your party... -> Somebody has been there already before the engagement. Check
...You Start Noticing (and Cringing at) His Little Quirks... -> I think this already happens after the first year of dating
...Your Friends Get Flaky... -> I don't think this is gonna happen with Ivy. Everybody wants her on a night in downtown. It just more fun with her energy around. For me, maybe. But people never call already, so nothing changes ;-)
...you'll find yourself screeching at him at some point because he forgot to call the photographer... -> As long as I have my Blackberry with my to do list, its unlikely this will ever happen. Ivy, just make sure I write everything down in my to-do-list. Than we won't have a problem.
...You're a budget freak, and he's never balanced a checkbook. You want a big, fat wedding, but he'd rather have a big, fat house..... -> 100% Ivy and me. Since Ivy hates that kind of financial stuff, I take care of the money. Problem solved
...Both of You Begin to Change... -> I think everybody changes their whole life.
...people are always giving you freebies and upgrades when they hear you're newly engaged, such as bottles of champagne... -> Prosecco please!!!
...Honeymoon planning. Think warm beaches, exotic cuisine, and having mucho, mucho "alone time".... -> I can't wait :-)
"The blender from him that was a testament to your margarita-making skills now seems like a domestic shackle." I'd say leave the blender out of it. Get real and check your head instead!
To Amber and Alice, I can only imagine that getting engaged is a major emotional event, a seismic shift in one's life, more than I would have thought before reading this article. Give us more insight here in these comments if you could!
I was just saying it's as big a deal or as complex as one makes it out to be. It's all mental.
Yes, getting engaged is a major emotional event, but people also get delusional, making up all kinds of stuff in their heads - fantasies - regarding their ideas of engagement, marriage, or any other big event in their lives. Like all things, it's a passing event, and we should experience it fully without adding too much concepts into it. Of course there are practical/buisness issues to consider when getting engaged/married, but that should be attended to on face value and not on an emotional/conceptual level.
People think too much and feel less. Yes, it's highly emotional, so just bask in it - feel every atom of it - but I suggest not to think too seriously about it (and life in general) and just ENJOY. I'm assuming everyone sincerely wants to be engaged just once in their (present) life. ;) Don't let that moment pass you by.
Call me a weirdo, but that's my take on it. Been married 5.5 years so far (was engaged 1.5 years prior), and the marriage still feels fresh and new each day. We live according to what feels right to our unique partnership, and don't bother with any bullshit that other people/society/articles say we should be concerned about.
To all the people who told me it's not supposed to be that hard. WTF man wtf
ReplyDeleteSome statements from the article and my comments:
ReplyDelete...doubts and freak-outs are crashing your party... -> Somebody has been there already before the engagement. Check
...You Start Noticing (and Cringing at) His Little Quirks... -> I think this already happens after the first year of dating
...Your Friends Get Flaky... -> I don't think this is gonna happen with Ivy. Everybody wants her on a night in downtown. It just more fun with her energy around. For me, maybe. But people never call already, so nothing changes ;-)
...you'll find yourself screeching at him at some point because he forgot to call the photographer... -> As long as I have my Blackberry with my to do list, its unlikely this will ever happen. Ivy, just make sure I write everything down in my to-do-list. Than we won't have a problem.
...You're a budget freak, and he's never balanced a checkbook. You want a big, fat wedding, but he'd rather have a big, fat house..... -> 100% Ivy and me. Since Ivy hates that kind of financial stuff, I take care of the money. Problem solved
...Both of You Begin to Change... -> I think everybody changes their whole life.
...people are always giving you freebies and upgrades when they hear you're newly engaged, such as bottles of champagne... -> Prosecco please!!!
...Honeymoon planning. Think warm beaches, exotic cuisine, and having mucho, mucho "alone time".... -> I can't wait :-)
"The blender from him that was a testament to your margarita-making skills now seems like a domestic shackle." I'd say leave the blender out of it. Get real and check your head instead!
ReplyDeleteTo Amber and Alice, I can only imagine that getting engaged is a major emotional event, a seismic shift in one's life, more than I would have thought before reading this article. Give us more insight here in these comments if you could!
ReplyDeleteBenjamin, aren't you glad we read this now?
I was just saying it's as big a deal or as complex as one makes it out to be. It's all mental.
ReplyDeleteYes, getting engaged is a major emotional event, but people also get delusional, making up all kinds of stuff in their heads - fantasies - regarding their ideas of engagement, marriage, or any other big event in their lives. Like all things, it's a passing event, and we should experience it fully without adding too much concepts into it. Of course there are practical/buisness issues to consider when getting engaged/married, but that should be attended to on face value and not on an emotional/conceptual level.
People think too much and feel less. Yes, it's highly emotional, so just bask in it - feel every atom of it - but I suggest not to think too seriously about it (and life in general) and just ENJOY. I'm assuming everyone sincerely wants to be engaged just once in their (present) life. ;) Don't let that moment pass you by.
Call me a weirdo, but that's my take on it. Been married 5.5 years so far (was engaged 1.5 years prior), and the marriage still feels fresh and new each day. We live according to what feels right to our unique partnership, and don't bother with any bullshit that other people/society/articles say we should be concerned about.